This is my first most prestigious award I’ve ever gotten in my entire life. It means a lot to me because I know that hard work really pays off when you really put in your effort. It makes me feel that working on your school project like a lifeless idiot everyday is worth every mile.
To be brutally honest, when I was young I hated my sister for being the “smart” one who always gets bursary awards while I’m not getting any. I always sensed that everyone loves her so much because she is the studious one. No matter how hard I try, I’m always not the one getting the attention.
I know I’m the attention seeker, but getting praised is always not happening to me. For years I could not comprehend why, but now I know.
This wasn’t the worst cert you’d see, but the story behind this is something I’d want to share.
Some time after getting my prelims results my Dad said to me, “I know that at this point of time, I can’t say much because even if I tried to and you won’t listen, you just won’t. To study or not study, the choice is yours. But I’d just hope that you won’t end up like me. Take a look at your aunts, uncle and me. I was given a chance to study, but I choose not to. If I did, I won’t have to work so hard now.” (Of course I translated into English la, my Dad is not that pro in English :P)
My chinese teacher also said similar thing before my O’s as well.
I kept these words in my heart because they affected me alot. But I probably realised it too late. I have no stable foundation to begin with in my studies, how do I excel in my studies? And because of this, I didn’t get to enter the course I want to.
Therefore after getting into DLA, I just hope to make the best out of it. It wasn’t something I like to do in the first place, but I tried my best. I want my poly life to be different. I want to make my parents proud of me. I don’t expect to top my class, but I just want to make sure I’ll have a better life after I graduated.
To achieve this, I had to slog my guts out in poly because I didn’t press myself that hard when I was young. Some people might think I’m no slacker and I don’t procrastinate at all. The truth is, I do. Whenever datelines are nearing and the stress I’m getting is piling up till I can’t breathe, I just can’t get myself to start doing anything at all. When I was in secondary school, it was so bad until I’d walked to the bus stop to go to school but I just decided to go home and sleep. I do this EVERYTIME whenever I feel stressed. Yet I couldn’t tell that I am stressed. All I thought at that time was I’m not feeling well. But I do not want to waste anymore time.
Getting this award is a reassurance to me. Seeing that the school recognizes this just make my day at the very end of it.
I’m a living example of what it means by “You reap what you sow“. As much as I hate to study like the most teenagers out there, I managed to do it and I think I would continue to do it after I graduated.
All in all, besides getting a reassurance out from this piece of paper, it also proves something to me：You don’t have to like what you do in order to excel in it. Sure, doing something you like gives you the confidence but in whatever you do (be it you like it or not), one have to really try their very best to see the difference they’d make in your life.